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Saturday, July 17, 2010

The Quest to be Different

If you have been one of those who has read my first blog post, you'd know that i always considered myself to be a little different and quirky than girls my age. I have always desired to be different. I am an agreeable and amicable person and tolerant as well but i want different things in life. My goals might not be in line with most people my age. I am also a perpetually confused soul but not so confused as to know what i don't want. What i don't want i am sure i DON'T want it at all but when it comes to being aware of what i want i am baffled.

God/Providence/Luck- (call it what you may) played a part and set me on a path which after taking i never looked back. Engineering in Printing and Packaging has been the single most and wisest decision of my life and i cherish it. I started with rosy dreams of being a Comps/ EXTC Engg just like any other engineering aspirant. Not so long ago, i wasnt aspiring to take up engineering at all. I hated the word "Engineering" it sounded so drab. It didn't make sense and i would have gladly taken up Medicine/ B.A./BSc and in fact i had taken up Bsc BUT as luck would have it, i got PPT and grabbed the opportunity well aware of the risk of venturing on an untrodden path.

Engineering is done, so to speak. I stand at cross roads in my life once again. Awaiting examination results and chilling when most friends have settled for a job and remaining are flying to foreign shores to pursue masters, i am just EXISTING.

Everyone does ultimately want a steady income and the only way to get that is a) work hard or b) work smart... At this point, i don't know if i want to study abroad next year or work for a while and then continue with post graduation. Even if i did settle for higher education, i am not sure about the course i'd like to take. There are a million things i want to learn. I just want to do so much (SO much on my mind and i wonder if i ll even be able to do 1/4th of the things) I WANT TO ENJOY EVERY MOMENT OF MY LIFE.

After 20 years, i want to look back and cherish memories of having achieved all i wanted and hopefully something worthwhile, not having kids and then cribbing saying "If i .....then i would/could/might have/....."

I guess there is no real answer to how i am going to chart my life. The only way to find out is to live each day till i get there.
It probably isn't all about doing really weird or different things as much as maybe doing things differently. Only in that shall my quest to be a little bit "hatke" be accomplished.
Like Mr. Shiv Khera says
"Winners don't do different things,
...they do things differently!"
and the meaning of WINNING for each one varies. At the end of it all it still means a sense of fulfillment.